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Doesn't time fly when you're drunk? - A Most Illuminating Tale
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Robert Wells or Mr Waters
Date: 12.40 am, Tuesday 15th June, 2004
Subject: Doesn't time fly when you're drunk?
Security: Public
Wednesday we shopped, ready for the party. One big trip to Macro. 12 fizz, 6 red, 6 white, 24 good lager, 24 cheap lager, 24 bitter, 24 cider, 24 diet coke with lemon, 24 real coke in bottles (it tastes better). We bought so much food and drink that we couldn't get it in the car. I had to sit cross-legged on a crate on the way home. Unpacking. Went to pick Nina from the station and spent a few minutes looking at the horses and the rabbits. Home. Dinner of steak and stuff. Dad showing off. Bed, late and slightly drunk.

Thursday was a bladed cooling device excrement interchange scenario. We cooked, cleaned and laid out the most beautiful spread you ever did see. I personally did the music and the salmon, which was cooked whole in the sink. Nina was a godsend. She helped with everything, and she was being a guest. When guests arrived I started feeling awkward and ended up either making a big point of getting drinks or changing the music to avoid having to chat to, for example, a primary school teacher who I probably haven't seen since I was 10. I got a bit drunk, but not as much as my Nan, who I had to hold up while trying to waltz with. More food was eaten than expected. Less booze than expected. I remember making a toast and being generally shit and nobody realising what I was doing. I remember an extrememly pissed octagenarian talking at Nina and I, finishing with "I'm off to recite some poetry!". At 9.30 precisely there was an exodus. Apart from a determined couple under our veranda and a determined few next door, the party departed. I got in a quick dance with Nina and Claire and a tap lesson. Then I sang loudly with Claire and Andrew. Then I ate more than I should and drank some more and then everybody was gone. all was quiet. So I jumped into the hottub, which is a great thing to do in the early hours.

By the time I was up and about on Friday, most of the dirty work had been done. I got up and did my bit and tried to make my way through the mountain of leftovers. I burst the helium balloons with the air rifle. My dad did it without them going pop. His went phhhhhhhhhhhhh, which was less fun. Decided I wouldn't get finished and went back to London. Nina and I were travelling out of Warwick parkway and we had an hour to kill, so we went and sat by the canal which was lovely and I took many photos. Uneventful train journey. Got home, ditched bags, went to Lucia's birthday at couch in soho. One drink. Left with Susannah for warehouse party for LIFT, behind OXO tower. Missed last tube and ended up getting Northern line to Hampstead and walking. Guests in my house when I got back. Kept me awake.

Rudely awoken on Saturday by guests not leaving. Did very little until leaving for dinner party in MH with Nina and Rose. Clockwise from myself: Orly, Charles, Rose, Nina, John, Tom, Miranda, James. Menu: Melon and kiwi with orange coulis, Thai green curry with rice and naan bread, strawberries and cream (I believe they were english). I brought 6 bottles of fizz that were left over from the diamond party. Most got drunk. John and Rose had a scrap, followed by Miranda and Rose (yay female twins wrestling). Drank too much. Liked Charles, rabitted at James, moaned at Miranda. Party games. Spilt the tea which stained blue.

Sunday I woke late and went for breakfast with Nina and Peter, which wasn't so scary. He told us about going to Alexandra Palace in the 60s and there being a giant bubble filled with bananas. Then to Bombay Dreams, where we saw the final performance before retooling. Well, once we'd sorted ourselves out after the ticket mix up. A good show, but very easy to tear the plot apart. Very cheesy, but this is not a bad thing in itself. Wonder along the south bank through a random market and then to dinner at an odd "restaurant". Home. Games. Sleep.

Woke late today. Packed. To the barbican to buy tickets to Black Rider. Emily Wiffen served me. Good to see her so happy. Then to Marylebone where I was given a fisherman's friend by the man on the gate. Home, fixed computer, ate food. Went into town to meet Aisa and take her sweets. She is looking as wonderful as ever. Whitefriars for a quiet drink or two (They sell Belgian Raspberry beer!). Didn't really want to leave. Home by taxi.
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