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Backdated hidden-type write up - A Most Illuminating Tale
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Robert Wells or Mr Waters
Date: 11.59 pm, Friday 7th January, 2005
Subject: Backdated hidden-type write up
Security: Public
Upon the feast of just and saintéd Cedd
(Whose college, fictional, in Cambridge lies),
Somewhere near dawn I raised me from my bed
And scrubbed and washed, and rubbed my weary eyes.
I spent my morning packing up my things,
My script, my suits, my mask and roses too,
And making sure I’d all I meant to bring
I still had time to drink another brew
Before my ma and I, with loaded car,
Set forth for where the unspoilt hills rise higher.
Soon, following a map as our star,
We found ourselves in Millford, Derbyshire.
(I feel this story quickly getting worse
And so, to make it suit the weekend fitter,
I’ll drop the rhyming portion of this verse
And simply write Iambic Pentametre)

I’d ventur’d in and run the crystal maze
To find my room (with cot and secret door)
When on the street pull’d up a markéd van
Bearing the name of blesséd Sainsburys.
Fantasia ensued as bag on bag
And crate on crate were loaded in the house.
When all the booze was lain before the fire
I knew that we were in for something great.
We introduced ourselves into the mic
And swiftly started our initial play:
The Cruel Exile of Thomas Mowbray or
The Tragedy of King Richard the Second.
My part, though small in lines and few in scenes
Was near the start, and panicking
I found myself endowed with Actor’s Voice
Which scarce I shook through seven other plays.
But once we’d rid the world of Thomas M,
I had the time to watch in wonderment
At Yves’ King Rick. Although I hate the part
(The likely cause my lack of empathy)
The sweet fair maid near raised a tear from me
And so I turned to manly Bolingbroke,
The keeper of the crown at checkpoint one.
The play complete, the clapping ceased, we found
Recording it had less than fully work’d,
And so one figure proudly soldier’d on
While some fine folk retired to change and mask
And some, with falling-down-type-water key,
Began to make a headway in the booze
(Myself and Marcus finished off two reds).
“To sup, said Greedy Guts” and sup we did
Upon the Thai that does not knot. When done
And seconds done and proudly exclaimed “Full!”
We drank (and drank) and sang and merry made.
For all my apprehensions I knew then
That this was something to be savouréd.
For all my worries they would all hate me
(And who’s to say? ‘Tis possible they do)
This score of people all are brothers, friends.
When fuelled enough with drink and love, some stripped
And steamed away our cares while others slept.
The Swedish lemon water kept us cool,
But melancholy soon I found myself
For sev’ral divers reasons, of the which
The chief was drink which I Should Not Touch.
Near four the room went dark and so we said
Our fond farewells, until the coming morn.
As Marcus slept, I whispered through the door
To lie awake another hour or more.
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The Alchemist
User: the_alchemist
Date: 5.59 pm, Tuesday 18th January, 2005 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
The alchemist salutes the gentle muse,
Who roused thee to lift pen in epic strain,
Thy friends to fill with mirth, and to enthuse,
Invoking golden days in hearts again.
Indeed, I think all nine of them did bring
Their gifts to thee, to make thy song complete:
Thalia laughter, Clio truth did sing
Calliope bound them up in words right meet.

And yet no muse has power to raise my pen
From earthy prose to poesy’s airy heights.
All nine despair – it is beyond their ken
To help me order rhythm and rhyme aright.
But wait! My leaden words transmuted now I see,
The tenth and greatest muse, the alchemist is thee!
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Marcus Ericsson 'Strongtrousers'
User: strongtrousers
Date: 8.01 pm, Tuesday 18th January, 2005 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
I
AM
NOT
WORTHY

of either of you. You're fabulous.
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Ashfae
User: ashfae
Date: 9.33 pm, Tuesday 18th January, 2005 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
*Agrees fervently*
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Robert Wells or Mr Waters: Rose
User: weaselspoon
Date: 5.53 pm, Saturday 22nd January, 2005 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Keyword:Rose
Whatever thoughts that come to me as I
Attempt to chronical my life, I know
That, where I write in all the shades of grey,
The Alchemist would play with a rainbow.
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yvesilena
User: yvesilena
Date: 8.14 pm, Tuesday 18th January, 2005 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
*laughs and applauds both of you*
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Dr. Puella
User: the_lady_lily
Date: 9.39 pm, Tuesday 18th January, 2005 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
If you manage to keep this up for the whole weekend, the next time we're in the same room I shall give you a huge hug and chocolate.
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Robert Wells or Mr Waters: Rose
User: weaselspoon
Date: 5.43 pm, Saturday 22nd January, 2005 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Keyword:Rose
I'm resisting...... strain to much....

As The Actress Said To The Bishop.

sorry.
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Robert M
User: borusa
Date: 12.41 pm, Thursday 20th January, 2005 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
It's very good!

But you haven't managed to jam in a reference to the Iliad yet. Perhaps you're saving that for the H6 section.

Can't wait for the next bit, anyhow.

Also, can't write a sentence properly, apparently.
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Robert Wells or Mr Waters: Rose
User: weaselspoon
Date: 5.42 pm, Saturday 22nd January, 2005 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Keyword:Rose
I'm trying to get as many odd references in as possible.

Any requests?
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Robert Wells or Mr Waters: Self
User: weaselspoon
Date: 12.23 am, Tuesday 25th January, 2005 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Keyword:Self
Actually, I've got a reference in to the Odyssey on Saturday. Is that good enough?
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Robert M
User: borusa
Date: 8.26 am, Tuesday 25th January, 2005 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Absolutely!
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yvesilena
User: yvesilena
Date: 10.45 pm, Friday 4th February, 2005 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
(yes, I know re-reading entries of this age is a symptom of gross procrastination..so sue me.. <3<3)

I don't believe I read this properly the first time. You paid me a great big compliment in there and I didn't say thank you.. sooo thank you ! :)

Any chance of finishing this soon? I know you're busy, but it's soooo good... and I want to see the rest of it... right... nowwww... *mock RII-y strop* :)
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